I attend a college that is pretty heavy on the Greek Life. I, personally, don’t understand it slash cannot stand it. I would very much rather sit in a rocking chair drinking a box of wine with three cats on my lap while I embroider profanity onto a floral sheet of cloth than play beer pong half naked with a bunch of sweaty dudes around me cheering me on.
But that doesn’t make me better than them in any way shape or form. I am not superior to them because they prefer to do one activity while I do the other.
I have grown up in a world where it’s natural and expected to hate on women who are different then me. I didn’t understand why until fairly recently: We’re all competing for attention. Women, I mean. We’re competing for the attention of others, we’re all trying to stand out and prove that we’re better than each other. But for what?
Honestly, the best answer I could come up with is to get the attention of men. Which is pretty heteronormative but hey, PATRIARCHY. It’s all about the men anyways.
I’m actively trying to combat this issue in my own brain. Every time I feel my brain start to groan when I’m in line at Starbucks and there’s a group of sorority sisters standing together chatting about their next function, I actively yell at myself. NOT LITERALLY, goodness, but I chastise myself in my brain and remind myself, “Hey, they’re beautiful women who have a different preferences than you do and that’s not a problem”. And then all of the sudden my brain says, “Her shoes are really great.” or “I wonder how she gets her hair to curl like that.” or “Damn her eyeliner is on point.”
Women are already being torn down by society through numerous different ways, I can’t even begin to count. Our patriarchal society has demeaned us to insults and images and not really much else. If we recognize that, why should we contribute to that and start dragging it down even more?
Uplift other women. Praise other girls. Give them confidence that you will support them in their endeavors and their futures. Empower each other to be strong and beautiful, because we are strong and beautiful and deserve to be treated with respect and kindness just like every other human being on this planet.
If you want a beautiful example of this, check out this interview with Reese Witherspoon discussing Gone Girl. Hollywood loves to paint the picture of these cat fights and wars that women have with each other that don’t actually exist, when in reality these women understand the brutal nature of the business and are trying to boost each other up even more. Shailene Woodley comments on her constant comparison with Jennifer Lawrence and she says, “I see us as separate individuals. And that’s important. As women, our insecurities are based on all these comparisons. And that creates distress.”
Women are individuals. Women are individuals who do not need to be compared and pitted against each other to be considered strong or desirable. If all of the lovely ladies of the world understand and love each other just a little bit more, we can be a much more powerful force than if we’re constantly at each other’s throats to battle for the attention of an unknown patriarchal force out that threw us into a metaphorical coliseum in the first place.
A collaborative two is much more powerful than an oppressive one.
Super Heroine Addiction 